I was a Little Bad Ass

When I was the  tiny age of 5-years-old, indeed I was a little  bad ass.
And  by the time  you finish reading this content, you will know how much of a bad ass  I really was.
When I was that innocent age of five  years, I hung around some rough boys who were also five. We would beat up on little kids. Break windows.
We would get a bucket of sand, scoop up some ants and go to our homes and scatter the sand full of ants all of the kitchen floor. My mother cried. "Where are all these ants coming from?" She sobbed.
One time, I threw a kid's bike into the swimming pool, simply because I didn't like him.
Another time, myself and my friend Eric, went to the construction yard and we tried to start up a bull dozer. I guess  we wanted to take a joy ride in the bull dozer. When we couldn't do it, we started throwing mud balls at each other.
A baby sitter was staying at our house for the weekend, because my parents were leaving town. Well, I crept in her room, took some baby powder and put it all over the room, including the dresser and her bed. Then, I got some toothpaste and I squeezed it in her bed. I will never forget the look on her face when she found out. It read, "How dare you!"
My sister and I one hot summer day, took a garden hose and sprayed it inside our house! Dis we get spanked? "Tomorrow." My father said. But tomorrow never happened.
My mother  and I  were in Church. My mother whispered to me, "I'm going to give you a missle."
Now here  I thought that this  "missle," Was a new kind of whistle, so I told my mother, "I'll blow on  it." "You blow on it  I will have to take it away from you."
And there I was. The  5-year-old little bad ass. And did I get spanked for all the things I did? You betcha!